Your child 5-11 years

Lack of autonomy: what to do?

Lack of autonomy: what to do?



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Dress without your help, blah! Play alone, no! To do one's homework ? Only if you stay close to him ... But when will your child finally decide to grow a little?

Between 5 and 12 years old, your child grows up and becomes more independent. This autonomy allows him to take on better and better support. He is more skillful in his behavior and develops his inner life from which he can draw to avoid boredom and dependence on others.

The problem

  • He always asks for your help, does not want to do anything alone.
  • At 5, he still can not put the scratchs of his shoes.
  • He refuses to do his homework if you are not at his side.
  • He never wants to play alone. Without someone near him, he is bored.
  • You go to the movies together, he really wants to know what you have planned to do next, and still after ... He is trying to plan everything and fill his time.

How to react ?

  • Every child reaches autonomy according to a rhythm of their own. Observe him to try to understand why you do not find him very independent.
  • Evaluate your requirements. Do not you ask him too much for his age? At 5 years old, you would like him to be able to put the cover alone ... Patience, he learns and his gestures will become more and more precise.
  • Ask yourself. Why does this situation bother you? Is not it a little because by devoting a lot of attention to it, do you lack time for yourself?
  • Observe him with a more distant eye. What you call lack of autonomy may be more of an anxiety related to fear of something. If he is afraid of the dark, he will need you to help him fall asleep.
  • Discuss with other parents with children of the same age. Without comparing them, try to know how they behave, if they are more (or less) autonomous in similar situations.

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